Reintroduced to Pieces of My Reality

It’s been a while
But I remember this feeling.
Anxiously alert,
Intimidated by obvious irrationality,
Defenses compromised by magnetic drama
And the very real parts of life
That I’ve found myself a part of.

Then there’s this compulsion to create.
Various mediums and tools
And opportunities are all around me,
Along with the surround sound of screams
And dead-air static.
Whispers from around corners,
Pens begging me to use them
Until they can’t give any more.
I keep looking down,
Staring back at blank pages,
Waiting to see who’ll win
This restless night.

I can’t help marveling
At how intertwined the Madness
And the Abstract
Appear to be.
Insanity motivating movement,
Anxious energy fueling creativity.
I focus on my career
Instead of inexplicable visions
And devious hallucinations.

It’s been a while
Since my thoughts have poured like this.
It’s been a while
Since I’ve been this lost and mad;
Since I’ve been reminded why
I’ve been so terrified
To lose my mind.
I can’t stop fighting against that,
I don’t want to struggle
With these crazy forces
Again.